Windy Sydney

When I have a day off I have to bake. I have no choice. It's an official addiction that I will need a 12 step program to quit. I don't want to quit. I like it.



Today, I made rose cupcakes.



The cake itself is chocolate and vanilla, but there is a banana cream center. They are topped with either chocolate frosting or banana frosting and then decorated with little fondant roses I made yesterday.



Hope you like them!

Andee

Yesterday I came across a thread on PostMormon.org that asked members of the website to share some of the craziest things you were taught as a member of the Mormon Church.

Yes, believing Mormons, I know that these things are not "doctrine." BUT (and this is a big big butt... hahahaha) the people who taught these things to members were leaders. They were bishops, stake presidents, seminary teachers... people with authority. This is what happens when it's so hard to figure out what is doctrine and what isn't... members have to pick and choose what to believe.

Here are some of the crazy things members were taught:

Once when I was like 12 [my Dad] told me that really evil people, you know, like people in bad Rock Bands, could be on stage and force their spirit to leave their body and go into the crowd and actually watch themselves perform. He then went on to say how dangerous that was though b/c while your spirit is out of your body, a Spirit has to be in the body to control it, so the Spirits that followed Satan and didn't get bodies would temporarily go into your body. Cause, you know, those evil Spirits that followed Satan wanted a body so bad that they would try to steal or at least try out a real humans body. But sometimes they wouldn't leave and then the real spirit that origionally left the body wouldn't have his body to go back into and the origional Spirit would be lost and trapped on earth without his body.

My dad also told me that Satan's spirits wanted bodies so badly that they created ones... That is where aliens come from. Aliens are Satan's spirits who created a body and have tried to come to our earth to study us to perfect their alien bodies that they created. UFO's and aliens are real, they are Satan's followers. My dad use to sit up for hours telling me these weird kind of things. And 20 years later I still think about them. And until a few years ago I actually believed most of these stories and was totally freaked out by them. I had nightmares about some of this shit when I was a kid.

Someone once told me that they believed aliens came from a planet that was run by a very righteous Mormon. After all, that is what the celestial kingdom is all about, right? Being like God and having your own planet/world?

Can't remember who said it, though... I believed the person for a long time.

• One of the things I had trouble with was that I had to have special priesthood keys to access special blessing from god. Shouldn't god be open to all? Also, that you had to use consecrated oil to bless the sick. It didn't make sense then, and doesn't now. It is all just wacky. The further I stand back and look in, the crazier it looks.
• Jesus died for my sins... because god isnt powerful enough to just forgive people out of kindness.
• And how about that 'Satan rules the waters' crap? If that's true then watch out for tsunamis because, dude, you're going to hell.
• How about the whole "god lives on Kolob" thing. Talk about weird.
• That black women were so sensual that they would easily lead faithful white priesthood males astray. Thus the entire Negro race was denied priesthood and entry to LDS temples. I was seventeen years of age, the place was Long Beach, California in a MIA class. I swear it happened, all the guys stared at each other and back to the instructor.
• That if there was a "heavenly manifestation" in your room that to determine if it was an resurrected being or one of Satan's minions...you asked the "spirit" to shake hands....if it was solid, it was resurrected and angelic, if it refused to shake hands...it was Lucifer's servant.
• That we shouldn't use birth control
• That you should have sex with your garments on, or the child you might conceive would not be born under the convent
• The earth is 6,000 years old. The reason scientists find all these fossils and date them to be billions of years old is because Jesus/God created the earth from spare parts in the galaxy. So dinosaurs are actually alien lifeforms who lived on other planets billions of years ago.
• The Three Nephites, as someone else mentioned. Part of me did want to see an episode of the Highlander TV series where Duncan fought the Three Nephites, though.
• Angels were seen in the temple.
• Garments protect people from grievous bodily harm.
• Masturbating was going to condemn me and that I should confess any such instances to my bishop so I could repent and not do it again.
• That if you're not exalted in the CK that you lose your genitalia and become a "smoothy" for all eternity.
• That we chose our own parents...
• That single people would become eternal servants to the married mormons because they are more "worthy."
• Everything is made out of two things: intelligence and matter (or material or something.) This means everything is made of intelligences: people, animals, rocks, trees, dirt, ETC. This is how miracles are performed. God speaks to the intelligences and telles them what to do: turn water to wine, split the red sea, bring back the dead. Intelligences only listen as long as they have respect for God, so He has to live by certain rules or he would cease to be God. This is supposedly why he can't save everyone. It wouldn't be just and the intelligences would no longer listen to God. Christ had to be a sinless sacrifice in order to win the respect of the intelligences. While our bodies are made of matter anmd intelligence, our "person/entity" consists of a single intelligences with no body. When someone goes to outer darkness, they are stripped of their physical and spiritual body and reduced to their single intelligence.
• As I was told, if it refused to shake hands it was God's angel that had not yet recieved a body and did not wish to try and decieve you. However if it tried to shake hands and you didn't feel anything, it was lucifer's angel attempting to decieve you. Apparently evil spirits have no subtlety.
• I guess the thing that weirded me out most was that we were part of a plan to create and populate infinite worlds, but no one ever said why. To what end? For what purpose? And if the "god of our world" was just senior management, then who was the president/CEO, and what was THEIR agenda? A very unsatisfying mythology, as these things go. My seminary teacher loved me, can you tell??
• That your blood changed when you were confirmed a member. IT was the blood of the tribe you were in, and it was more pure than that of the rest of society.
• I remember learning in seminary that the Eagles song "Hotel California" (which I happened/happen to love) was satanic and that we shouldn't listen to it. I was listening to it the other day in the car and it seems so obviously about the california music industry (?) In any case, I don't see how they get satanic. Where do they come up with some of this stuff?
• So many bizarre things, how to choose? Kolob is definitely up there, also polygamy. Most hurtful to me was that those born in Asia, Africa, etc. were less valiant in the pre-existence so they had to basically be born in lives that suck as opposed to me who must have been really valiant in the pre-existence because I was born to a white LDS family in Provo, UT.
• A "suicide" can't be buried facing east. not worthy.
• To always remember that [Heavenly Father] is a man and to always dress appropriately when kneeling before him in prayer. this includes no "nightgowns" allowed . this was taught to us last year in a modesty lesson in RS.
• My wife read a great one supposedly attributed to Brother Brigham which warned women that the baptism of the holy ghost could get them pregnant. I think he was making reference to the holy ghost overshadowing mary to bring about Christ's conception.
• The church was big on the fact that we had purpose in our lives because we knew the plan of salvation. God's purpose is "to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man", and we are to help with this. Well, I always wondered, if the purpose of life is eternal life, what's the purpose of eternal life? To perpetuate the cycle? Never made a lot of sense to me.
• And whoever would want to be a god/goddess? To be in charge of your own world and watch your children suffer at one another's hands? Plus, running a world sounds like a lot of work.
• Our bishop last year preached from the pulpit during SM about Bette Midler's song From a Distance. how she doesn't understand who God is or how he works. he drew parallels to the song that made me wonder how the hell did he get that from it? i loooooove Bette (have seen her live 3 times) and i love that song. i was uber-annoyed to listen to him tear it apart. i told my hubby that he'd better let him know i was not happy in their next bishopric meeting.
• I was taught in Seminary that this earth served as the Paradise/Spirit Prison waiting room before the Second Coming. So all those who had lived before on the earth were wandering around the planet in a different dimension.So, yeah... weird, huh?
• Dinosaurs died in the flood because there wasn't room for them on Noah's ark. Also, dinosaurs were created and killed just so we could have fossil fuels.
  

I love the PostSecret.com website.

People from all over the world make homemade postcards with a deep dark secret on it, and mail it anonymously to the owner of this website to share their secret with the world. I love this website so much because it shows that everyone is human. Everyone has made mistakes, everyone has a story.

This is one of the secrets posted today:


I wonder how many people out there find their wedding day to be full of turmoil and pain instead of the day little girls dream about...

Andee

I have mentioned before that I ordered this ring from the internet (click here to order yours!):


It's a CTL ring, and I love it. I wear it every single day to work just because I can. The way I see it, if people want to wear CTR rings expressing their love of the Mormon Church, I can wear a CTL ring expressing my willingness to leave the church.

Many ask what CTL stands for. To be honest, I am not sure. Here are my takes on it..

Choose the Left (political)
Choose to Leave (hell yeah)
Choose to Live
Choose to Love (love anyone you want)

There are probably millions of other sayings you could connect with the initials on the silver band, but those are my favorites.

One of the things I enjoy about this little trinket, is that the symbol clearly mimics the classic "Choose the Right" logo the church uses. Most people that get a glimpse of the ring immediately assume it's a CTR ring and jump right in with testimonies and news of how wonderful the church is. It makes me an instant friend.

I never correct people when they assume it's a CTR ring. For one, it's not the time or the place (since this happens at work most of the time). Getting into the fact that I am a big fat apostate at my work location isn't exactly model employee behavior. Also, I am representing my company while I am on the clock, and they might just think I am evil, and therefore the company I work for is evil. Sad, but true.

Also, people in Utah are very militant about Mormonism. Any voice that is against the church is immediately insulting. I don't hate Mormons, I just don't like the way the church is run... not to mention the amount of information kept from active members. Insulting people at work isn't model behavior either.

It kills me how friendly people are to me when they glance at my ring. They look me in the eye, smile, and start chit-chatting about anything under the sun. If they really took a harder look at the ring, they would have a completely different opinion of me, wouldn't they?

Isn't this slight proof that Utah Mormons judge people by religion? Isn't it telling that a simple piece of jewelry makes believing members want to be kind to me? How kind would they be if I had no ring at all?

Today an older gentleman saw the ring and assumed it was a CTR ring. He said, "You must be a member of the church..." Technically, I am. So I responded with, "Yes, I am a member."

He then asked me if I was active, and I told him no.

"Why not?"

None of your business, dude!

Lets also mention that explaining the thousands of problems I have with the LDS church would take all day, and I have a job to do.

Things that make you go "hmmmmmmm...."

Andee

First, read this:

Still dazed after being anaesthetised for three hours, a pedigree pet is hauled upright to show off its new tattoo.

The controversial “body enhancement” was carried out on Mickey – a rare Canadian Hairless breed also known as a Sphynx cat.

His female owner was said to be delighted with the Tutankhamun design inked on to his chest at a tattoo parlour.

She said: “I wanted something new and different for the times we live in.”

But horrified animal rights campaigners last night slammed the sick fad in Moscow as barbaric – and fear it could catch on among wealthy pet owners in the West.

An RSPCA spokesman said: “We are totally against using animals for purely cosmetic reasons just on the owner’s whim. Clearly the animal has no say in the matter.

“We do not believe in using pets as fashion accessories. It shows no respect for the animal whatsoever. So far we have only heard about this practice happening overseas – and we hope it doesn’t spread.”

Prepare yourself.

You are about to either laugh your ass off or stare at your computer screen in complete disbelief...

Picture it:

A woman goes to a local McDonald's, orders chicken McNuggets, and pays. A few minutes later the employee who took her money explained they ran out of Chicken McNuggets, and offered the women a McDouble sandwich or french fries. Instead of honoring this woman's request by refunding the money she paid, a McDonald's employee refused to process a refund saying, "All sales are final." The woman asks to see a manager, and the same employee tells the customer that she was the manager.

She wasn't the manager.

Wait... it gets sooooooo much better...

What does this customer do when faced with this chain of events?

Guess...

Go ahead... guess...

Get ready...

She CALLS 911... and not just once, but THREE TIMES. Here are a few quotes from the 911 operator's transcript:

“This is an emergency, If I would have known they didn’t have McNuggets, I wouldn’t have given my money, and now she wants to give me a McDouble, but I don’t want one,” Latreasa L. Goodman told police. “This is an emergency.”

Wow, I was just featured on Utah Loves Cupcakes, a wonderful blog about everything cupcake in my home state.

What an honor!!!

Andee

Why is it, that when we leave the church we are not allowed to discuss the reasons why to our families and friends who are still believers? They immediately turn away from us, convinced that we have been deceived by Satan or that we are being led away from the truth.

It's unfair.

In reality, we are the ones with the truth.

Yes, really.

The other day someone on PostMormon.org mentioned that one of his neighbors was investigating the church. He was at a crossroads of what to do. He couldn't stand back and not give them the whole story, because we all know that missionaries don't give accurate descriptions of history or doctrine of the church.

He considered them friends, and he wanted to kindly explain some of the reasons he left.

He called them up on the phone and calmly explained the reason for his call. He wasn't forceful or angry, just polite and HONEST. He told them that if they had any questions for him, an ex-Mormon, to feel free to ask... and ask they did.

After he explained the scientific reasons for leaving, the mind control, the tithing... one thing after another... they saw the complete picture. We don't know if they will join the church or not, but now they have all the information they need to make an educated decision.

People investigating this so-called Church have a right to know these things before they become members. They have the right!!!

When members of the church find out that we have been talking to potential converts, they get angry and claim we are spreading lies to keep people away from the gospel. This is ridiculous.

We have to speak up.

If you had a neighbor/friend who was getting involved in a business scheme that you fell for once in the past, would you stand by and not say anything? Could you?

I couldn't.

Andee

My Mom and I love coconut, and I had a giant bag of it in my pantry practically screaming, "Andee! Andee! Use me!!"

So, I did.

I went with dark chocolate cupcakes. I love dark chocolate because the flavor is a little more rich. The coconut is a strong flavor, so you need something to balance that out. Of course, any cake flavor would probably work...

I decided to make a coconut cream for the center of the cupcakes...

All I used was a little coconut, sugar, and whipped cream from my fridge. It was really sweet, but delicious. I used the "cone method" to put the filling in the cupcakes and replaced the lid before adding the frosting and decorations.


I went with plain vanilla frosting because I wanted to roll the cupcakes into leftover coconut. Here are the results!