Our Sacred Duty to Honor Women

Posted by: Andee / Category: , , ,

\It's been a really long time since I flipped through my Ensign collection, and when I was cleaning up my desk today an old 1999 Ensign literally fell open to a page sharing a Priesthood Session talk. It was an act of God! I have shared commentary on this article before, but I thought this would be fun.

Our Sacred Duty To Honor Women
Elder Russell M. Nelson

It is a joy to be with you tonight, brethren, and wonderful to see so many young men with their fathers. We are assembled because of our desire to hearken to the leaders of the Church. But this congregation is unique. I don’t see any mothers. Not one of us could be here without a mother, yet we are all here—without our mothers.

Yes, Mr. Nelson... you are right. You don't see any mothers. Wanna know why? Cause the church is sexist. Yes. Lets take some time to calm our inner voices that scream at us that we belong to an organization that teaches men have blessings that women can never have by talking about our DUTY to honor women. Nice.

Tonight I am attending with a son, sons-in-law, and grandsons. Where are their mothers? Gathered in the kitchen of our home! What are they doing? Making large batches of homemade doughnuts! And when we return home, we will feast on those doughnuts. While we enjoy them, these mothers, sisters, and daughters will listen intently as each of us speaks of things he learned here tonight. It’s a nice family tradition, symbolic of the fact that everything we learn and do as priesthood bearers should bless our families.

Are you fucking kidding me?

When you go home from patting your fellow priesthood holding buddies on the back you are going home and the women in your family are going to shower you with homemade doughnuts? What is wrong with them? Oh wait... I forgot. They were trained to behave this way since they were fetuses. My bad.

I have a hard time thinking that this guy's women-folk want to sit around the table and listen to stories about the meeting they WERE NOT ALLOWED TO ATTEND BECAUSE THEY WERE WOMEN! Oh, and for the record, relief society having it's own meeting isn't even close and everyone knows it... don't even try it TBMs. Not the same.

Let us speak about our worthy and wonderful sisters, particularly our mothers, and consider our sacred duty to honor them.

I would love to marry a man who felt he had a DUTY to honor me. It's almost like this guy thinks men have to be reminded to love the women in their lives. I mean, they are 'just women' and all.

When I was a young university student, one of my classmates urgently pleaded with a group of us—his Latter-day Saint friends—to donate blood for his mother, who was bleeding profusely. We went directly to the hospital to have our blood typed and tested. I’ll never forget our shock when told that one of the prospective donors was unfit because of a positive blood test for a venereal disease. That infected blood was his own! Fortunately, his mother survived, but I’ll never forget his lingering sorrow. He bore the burden of knowing that his personal immorality had disqualified him from giving needed aid to his mother, and he had added to her grief. I learned a great lesson: if one dishonors the commandments of God, one dishonors mother, and if one dishonors mother, one dishonors the commandments of God.


We go straight from forcing ourselves to honor women into a story about venereal disease.

Honor Motherhood

During my professional career as a doctor of medicine, I was occasionally asked why I chose to do that difficult work. I responded with my opinion that the highest and noblest work in this life is that of a mother. Since that option was not available to me, I thought that caring for the sick might come close. I tried to care for my patients as compassionately and competently as Mother cared for me.

Yeah, right.

I am sure thats what you said. You wanted to be a doctor because you couldn't be a mother. Sure. I believe you.

Many years ago the First Presidency issued a statement that has had a profound and lasting influence upon me. “Motherhood,” they wrote, “is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by mankind. It places her who honors its holy calling and service next to the angels.”

The why the HELL are women not allowed to hold the priesthood?

Bless our own babies?

Pass the fricking sacrament?

What sense does that make?

Because mothers are essential to God’s great plan of happiness, their sacred work is opposed by Satan, who would destroy the family and demean the worth of women.

Oh, Gawd. Spare me. What is demeaning to women? Sexism and not being allowed the same rights and responsibilities as the men in our lives.

You young men need to know that you can hardly achieve your highest potential without the influence of good women, particularly your mother and, in a few years, a good wife. Learn now to show respect and gratitude. Remember that your mother is your mother. She should not need to issue orders. Her wish, her hope, her hint should provide direction that you would honor. Thank her and express your love for her. And if she is struggling to rear you without your father, you have a double duty to honor her.

That is right, young men.

Who will wash your clothes, iron them? The women.

Who will cook your favorite meals and then follow up with a 5 star jello dessert? The women.

Who will clean your home and decorate and scrapbook? The women.

Without the women, you will have no direction because you will be wandering around in filth!

The influence of your mother will bless you throughout life, especially when you serve as a missionary. Long years ago, Elder Frank Croft was serving in the state of Alabama. While preaching to the people, he was forcefully abducted by a vicious gang, to be whipped and lashed across his bare back. Elder Croft was ordered to remove his coat and shirt before he was tied to a tree. As he did so, a letter he had recently received from his mother fell to the ground. The vile leader of the gang picked up the letter. Elder Croft closed his eyes and uttered a silent prayer. The attacker read the letter from Elder Croft’s mother. From a copy of that letter, I quote:

“My beloved son, … remember the words of the Savior when He said, … ‘Blessed are ye when men shall revile you and persecute you and say all manner of evil against you falsely for my name’s sake. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad for you will have your reward in Heaven for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.’ Also remember the Savior upon the cross suffering from the sins of the world when He had uttered these immortal words, ‘Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.’ Surely, my boy, they who are mistreating you … know not what they do or they would not do it. Sometime, somewhere, they will understand and then they will regret their action and they will honor you for the glorious work you are doing. So be patient, my son, love those who mistreat you and say all manner of evil against you and the Lord will bless you and magnify you. … Remember also, my son, that day and night, your mother is praying for you.”

Elder Croft watched the hateful man as he studied the letter. He would read a line or two, then sit and ponder. He arose to approach his captive. The man said: “Feller, you must have a wonderful mother. You see, I once had one, too.” Then, addressing the mob, he said: “Men, after reading this Mormon’s mother’s letter, I just can’t go ahead with the job. Maybe we had better let him go.” Elder Croft was released without harm.

Oh... so the mother saved him via letter? That is one hell of a faith-promoting story. Maybe this one actually happened.

The reaction of the gang leader along with the words "feller" "Mormon's mother's letter" and "go ahead with the 'job'" force me to state that this story is probably about half-true.

Just like the rest of Mormon history.

We are deeply grateful for the faithful mothers and fathers of our wonderful missionaries. The love they bear for their children is sublime.

What about the mothers who are not members of the church?

What about the mothers of the world who don't have the money to pay for milk to give to their children?

Where art thy tithing funds for these honorable women?

Instead, lets talk about honoring them in our million dollar church building made with the finest materials money can buy, and project our voices with the latest of modern technology and sit here in our nice expensive silk-lined suits (that the women will clean) dreaming about our homemade doughnuts.

Honor the Sisters

We who bear the holy priesthood have a sacred duty to honor our sisters. We are old enough and wise enough to know that teasing is wrong. We respect sisters—not only in our immediate families but all the wonderful sisters in our lives. As daughters of God, their potential is divine. Without them, eternal life would be impossible. Our high regard for them should spring from our love of God and from an awareness of their lofty purpose in His great eternal plan.

Yes, we respect them... but we don't give them the same rights and power. The women are simply here to get us eternal life. Without them, we get no doughnuts in the celestial kingdom.

Hence, I warn against pornography. It is degrading of women. It is evil. It is infectious, destructive, and addictive. The body has means by which it can cleanse itself from harmful effects of contaminated food or drink. But it cannot vomit back the poison of pornography. Once recorded, it always remains subject to recall, flashing its perverted images across your mind, with power to draw you away from the wholesome things in life. Avoid it like the plague!

Women are always lumped with sex in the eyes of the church. Is this our only purpose? Wait... the doughnuts. My bad. I love how every single talk about respecting women goes directly to porn. The Mormon leaders talk a LOT about porn.

Honor Your Wife

To you who are not yet married, think about your future marriage. Choose your companion well. Remember the scriptures that teach the importance of marriage in the temple:

“In the celestial glory there are three heavens or degrees;

“And in order to obtain the highest, a man must enter into this order of the priesthood [meaning the new and everlasting covenant of marriage];

“And if he does not, he cannot obtain it.”

The highest ordinances in the house of the Lord are received by husband and wife together and equally—or not at all!

Equally? Are you kidding me?

What part of the temple wedding ceremony is equal?

The time where she gets a new temple name and tells it to her new hubby and he doesn't give her his name? Is it when he makes covenants to God and she makes covenants to honor her husband? Maybe it's when she wears a veil? Hmm... equal.

I would also love to point out that the temple wedding ceremony was created to cover up the wonderful relationships that were polygamous marriages. SECRET polygamous marriages. Yes. One man, and up to 50 or more women? Ahhh... equality.

In retrospect, I see that the most important day of my life was the day when my sweetheart, Dantzel, and I were married in the holy temple. Without her I could not have the highest and most enduring blessings of the priesthood. Without her I would not be the father to our wonderful children or grandfather to our precious grandchildren.

Yes, very good. In science we learn that you must have sperm and egg to create a baby. What this has to do with your made-up blessings I will never know.

As fathers we should have love unbounded for the mothers of our children. We should accord to them the gratitude, respect, and praise that they deserve. Husbands, to keep alive the spirit of romance in your marriage, be considerate and kind in the tender intimacies of your married life. Let your thoughts and actions inspire confidence and trust. Let your words be wholesome and your time together be uplifting. Let nothing in life take priority over your wife—neither work, recreation, nor hobby.

An ideal marriage is a true partnership between two imperfect people, each striving to complement the other, to keep the commandments, and to do the will of the Lord.

As long as they let you be in charge, make the big decisions, and make you homemade doughnuts.

Fathers Preside over the Family in Love

The family is the most important unit of society and of the Church. The family is ordained of God. It is central to His plan for the eternal destiny of His children. “God has established families to bring happiness to his children, to allow them to learn correct principles in a loving atmosphere, and to prepare them for eternal life.”

Fathers PRESIDE OVER the family in love. They try really hard to make the whole equality thing stick out, but sentences like that one undo every single thing this guy has said thus far.

Parents have the primary responsibility for the welfare of their children.

Yeah, duh.

The Church does not replace that parental responsibility.

Again... yeah... duh...

Ideally, the Latter-day Saint family is presided over by a worthy man who holds the priesthood. This patriarchal authority has been honored among the people of God in all dispensations. It is of divine origin, and that union, if sealed by proper authority, will continue throughout eternity. He who is the Father of us all and the source of this authority demands that governance in the home be in love and righteousness.

AHA! Finally! A glimpse into the psyche!

"The Latter-day Saint family is PRESIDED OVER BY A WORTHY MAN WHO HOLDS THE PRIESTHOOD. THIS PATRIARCHAL AUTHORITY has been honored among the people of God in all dispensations."

What does that mean? It means the men are in charge, and the women get to churn our babies, clean the house and make doughnuts. Oh, I love being a girl!

Hmm... again, why can't women hold the priesthood? Because the men say we can't? Oh, okay...

You fathers can help with the dishes, care for a crying baby, and change a diaper. And perhaps some Sunday you could get the children ready for Church, and your wife could sit in the car and honk.


Thats right. "You fathers can help with the dishes, help with a crying baby and change a diaper." Isn't it sad that you have to tell these men this??? Isn't this a sign that women are NOT being treated with equality?

I would also LOVE to meet the asshole who waits in the car and honks while the wife gets the 14 children ready for church. What the HELL? Why should you even have to say this???

“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.” With that kind of love, brethren, we will be better husbands and fathers, more loving and spiritual leaders. Happiness at home is most likely to be achieved when practices there are founded upon the teachings of Jesus Christ. Ours is the responsibility to ensure that we have family prayer, scripture study, and family home evening. Ours is the responsibility to prepare our children to receive the ordinances of salvation and exaltation and the blessings promised to tithe payers. Ours is the privilege to bestow priesthood blessings of healing, comfort, and direction.

The home is the great laboratory of love. There the raw chemicals of selfishness and greed are melded in the crucible of cooperation to yield compassionate concern and love one for another.

Blah... blah... blah...

Oh, and I love how he mentions tithing in that sentence. He totally slips in it there without getting most people to take notice.

Oh, and thanks again for reminding the women that they DON'T have your magical powers of healing, comforting and giving directions because they are girls. Yeah. Equality my ass.

Honor the special sisters in your lives, brethren. Express your love to your wife, to your mother, and to the sisters. Praise them for their forbearance with you even when you are not at your best. Thank the Lord for these sisters who—like our Heavenly Father—love us not only for what we are but for what we may become. Humbly I thank God for my mother, my sisters, my daughters, granddaughters, and for my special sweetheart, companion, and friend—my wife!

May God bless us to honor each virtuous woman I pray in the name of Jesus Christ, amen


This is a prime example of the reason I can no longer watch general conference on television without forcing myself to pause the DVR and take mental health breaks.

It's ridiculous to me that the men and women are split up into separate groups and not allowed to learn the exact same things, be treated the exact same way, and given the exact same blessings.

What is so hard to understand about that?



  1. [kɹeɪ̯ɡ̊] Says:

    and *puke*

    That doughnuts thing is just insane. How anyone with half a brain can overlook the insane sexism of that little story is beyond me.

  1. Kelly Says:

    yeah I second a *puke* here. True believers can overlook it because that is what they truly believe their role is. Ugh, it just pisses me off.

  1. maybemaybenot Says:

    This post cracks me up, Andee. You are the greatest. I can just hear his tone now. It's that syrupy-sweet, condescending, patronizing Thomas-Monsony type voice. Even aside from the insanity of the message here - who talks like this?

    "We who bear the holy priesthood have a sacred duty to honor our sisters. We are old enough and wise enough to know that teasing is wrong." Really? Because you sound like you are talking to a kindergarten class.

    Nothing screams louder "I am looking at porn on the internet" than this article.

    Thank you for reminding me of one of the many reasons why I escaped from Mormonism!