I have a confession to make.
I love infomercials.
As Jerry Seinfield once (loosely) said, "There is a time at night when you start to believe these things. At one point I look at my television and think, 'You know... I can't cut through a shoe with any of my knives! I need to order that knife and cut my shoes up!!' There is nothing about my life more embarrassing than the fact that I picked up my phone and uttered the words, 'I would like to order the Ginzu knife.'"
I think it's true. There is a time at night, when your brain is close to shutting itself off that you start thinking about how much these infomercials make sense.
I don't know if it's the female hosts who lack acting skills (seriously, sometimes watching them is like watching a train wreck. It's so bad that you can't stop looking at it!) or their co-hosts who most of the time have an accent. I think Americans immediately think someone with a British or Australian accent is smart and trustworthy. It's brilliant marketing. Sometimes it's the little clips they throw out to show you how their wonderful product will make your life easier.
You can pretty much sell anything you want in an infomercial. Health and fitness products that look fun and "wont turn working out into a chore!" Various kitchen appliances that miraculously do a million jobs in one and clear up all that clutter on your kitchen counters. Cleaning products that use all natural ingredients and work better than the chemical cleaners you buy in the store. You name it, it's out there.
Sometimes the hosts of these infomercials become famous. A household name. Everyone knows who Billy Mays is, right? How about Vince, the ShamWow! guy? Not only is this dude famous for his quotes like, "You'll love my nuts" he also beat up a prostitute in a hotel room not too long ago.
Bam! Bam! Bam! Home fries. Bam! Breakfast to go! How will I live without the slap chop?
I can't get over the name. Nad's. It's so wrong it's right.
The Tiddy Bear. The first couple times I saw this commercial I thought, "WTF??" I don't know about you guys, but if someone saw me driving around with a little plush bear on my boobs I would be embarrassed as Hell. Got my attention, though. The person selling these things probably owns his own private jet by now...
Sometimes the product is for things of a personal nature... and by personal, I mean personal:
I love it when they make the set look like an authentic news program as if people are thinking, "Well, if a journalist is talking about this product on their newscast the claims MUST be true!!" Ha.
Okay, is that one even real?
This Quacker Factory lady makes me laugh every time I see her. If I could use one word to describe the clothing in that clip, classy would be at the bottom of the list. I do love her 80's headband, though. You have to give her credit for being... um... unique.
One of my favorite infomercials of all time...
The Magic Bullet.
Oh, that Berman! What a card!
I don't know about the rest of you, but the morning after a big party I invite all guests into my kitchen so I can teach them about kitchen appliances. I mean... you have to do it. You don't want to be a bad host!
Last, but certainly not least, we have Ron Popeil. His company, Ronco, was everywhere in the 90's. Product after product. Everything from the pocket fisherman to food dehydrator to hair in a can. This guy could sell anything. His co-host in the first two clips drive me nuts... but in a good way. A way that makes me giggle.
Anyone else notice how loud those damn pasta makers are? I swear to Zeus it sounds like a jumbo jet coming in for a landing.
Good times... good times.
I have a confession to make.