What Happened to My Dream?

Posted by: Andee / Category:


When I was in sixth grade, I decided that I wanted nothing more than to be a doctor. I wanted to help people and save lives. The whole thing seemed amazing to me, you would constantly be challenged... learning and adapting to the latest technology. I thought it would be an amazing rush to work in the ER and be able to make a difference somehow.

Right now I am watching a show on ABC called, "Hopkins." It's a reality/documentary series about doctors learning valuable lessons and doing their best to help their patients.

The show covered a premature birth of a baby boy who sadly didn't survive, and a kidney transplant between a husband and wife. The stories are amazing, and at times hard to watch. You wish the best for these people dealing with life threatening injuries and health problems, but you know in your mind that there is no way everyone can be saved. Sometimes there is nothing you can do.

Right after high school, my Dad was diagnosed with cancer. He fought like hell to survive, and he told me on many occasions that he didn't want to die. He was only 44 years old when he took his last breath, and I know for a fact that every doctor and nurse he came in contact with did everything within their power to help him. There was nothing they could do in the end.

When I watched my Dad go through his cancer, I came to the conclusion that there was no way I could ever be a doctor. I would become emotionally attached to my patients (that is a good thing, and a bad thing) and I would take any death hard. Very hard. I couldn't handle it. I know it.

I have nothing but respect for those in the health care industry. They go through tons of schooling, residency, and a lot of trial and error. Even when they do their best to save someone they have to deal with death and suffering on a daily basis. Sure, they end up making good money, but I think that money is well deserved. They sacrifice their personal time to learn how to help people... and lets not forget that most doctors have a hell of a lot of student loans to pay off once they get into practice.

Not sure where this was meant to go... sorry... done now :)
Andee


2 comments:

  1. Anonymous Says:

    Oh, Andee....I will admit I'm extra sensitive in the morning, but I am in tears thinking of your dad and how difficult that must have been for all of you.

    While I do my share of bitching about the waiting rooms, bedside manner, and HMO red tape I agree that those in the medical profession are for the most part amazing people doing the best job they can under crazy circumstances. With one exception, I have had nothing but good experiences with ER and hospital staff.

    I never wanted to be a doctor- I can't stand the sight of other people's blood and pain- but I really wanted to be a veterinarian for a long time. But like you I would come home crying every night because I get too emotionally attached to animals. I know I would probably get numb to it, but I don't really want to lose that part of myself.

  1. Elder Joseph Says:

    Doctors do a great job.They save the lives of many people simply because of their knowledge ,commitment and hard work.

    They are helped of course by the Pharmaceutical and drugs industries and various other experts.This is one of the benefits of a growing and prosperous economy.

    On many occasions in church , members who were hospitalised and cured through a team of nurses and doctors would instead give thanks to the Priesthood ( for supposed blessings which cured them) and I never heard a mention of those Doctors and Nurses who actually helped make them better again.

    In reality they have no faith in the Priesthood or their testimonies of the LDS Truth.They are just as scared and uncertain to leave the world they claim to hate than any other group of people.

    I particularly found distressing seeing single women seemingly dependant and asking for blessings from the men.The best blessing they could have is to realise that anything amiss in their life needs themselves to sort it out by actually trusting and empowering themselves rather than some magical incantation from a Melchizo holder! lol